"Maturity is: The ability to stick with a job until it's finished; the ability to do a job without being supervised; the ability to carry money without spending it and the ability to bear an injustice without wanting to get even." - Abigail Van Buren
I am deeply moved by that quote and, given its challenge, I am certain that at one point or another we have all failed to show maturity.This goes along with another thought that I have been rolling around in my head for awhile. All sin is ultimately a selfish act. Now I realize that's quite a definitive statement but I have not yet been able to come up with a sin that is not, at its core, based on selfish desire.
And so it gets me back to the concept of maturity. As we age we think that a lot of things make us "mature" - such as bills, homes, family, marriage, the ability to take a joke. However, I wonder how much of us think of maturity as it relates to sin. Being immature is behaving like a child and it is well known that children will act impulsively and utterly selfishly until taught otherwise. Babies are not remotely interested in their mother's sleep schedule. They want food and they want it NOW. It is as children grow and are taught that other people and other people's needs matter that they begin to consider that demanding immediate gratification is not always best..........
Oh wait. I just described the behavior that I have when someone is driving down the road 15 miles under the speed limit. I want them to move and I want it NOW. Seriously.......sorry for the tangent, but you see my point. Even though we may consider ourselves mature we revert back to our childlike behavior and frequently that is when we sin.
The last line of that quote is what really got me thinking about this yesterday. I had my feelings hurt badly last week by someone that I once considered a friend and as frequently happens in those scenarios I mull over the injustice of it in my head thinking over all the vicious things I wish I could say to the person. (By the way I realize that is totally NOT the good Christian nor the right answer, but it is an honest answer). In this case, I was challenged in my thoughts that it was selfish of me to want to speak my mind and, realistically, it was sinful too. Those thoughts I had were not kind, loving or useful for edification; they were hateful and full of spite and disdain. But in our culture it is really promoted. If you feel slighted you have the right to say something, to speak your mind, to rip them a new one...... But I know, at that moment, that I was wrong. I am not mature enough to be able to curb my selfish desire for the immediate gratification of telling that person off. I want to state my case to make myself feel better. It really isn't about hurting the person who hurt me.
It is not wrong to stand up for something that you believe in (and rest assured I believed in my innocence in that situation) but it is sinful when our pride causes us to act selfishly and meet our immediate desire for revenge instead of keeping our eyes focused on the greater goal of pleasing God no matter the cost. It costs the loss of our will to please God. And that means not defending myself against false accusations if my only purpose is to make myself feel better in the moment. I realize that may sound odd but think about Jesus. He was the master of standing up under accusations and hate and not lashing out at people. Jesus kept his eyes focused on why he came in the first place, to save us from our selfish selves even when facing down people bent on hurting him.
How often do we as Christians worry about our "right" to immediate gratification of our desires, whether it is food, speaking our mind, driving speed or any other number of entitlements? If we are to truly live for Christ our "rights" are forfeit. We must give up those things which we feel entitled to and live instead only by the guidelines of Christ. God doesn't give us the right to tear someone else down because they hurt us. God doesn't give us the right to get drunk and forget our problems. God doesn't give us the right to scream and wish a painful death upon the person who cut us off on the freeway; for as my daughter says to me when I'm mad at other drivers, "Mom, they can't hear you." No they can't. I am doing it purely for my own gratification. Those choices are all selfish and all are seeking the immediate gratification of our human sin nature.
While the world may tell you that you have the right to do whatever you want, as a follower of Christ you really don't. Trust me, this is not a bad thing. God does not want for us to continue to be a petulant child. He wants us to grow. He wants us to make better choices. He wants us to mature enough to give up the rights we think we have to exercise to that we may claim the promises he wants to bestow on us. It is not easy but painful. And well worth it.
I am deeply moved by that quote and, given its challenge, I am certain that at one point or another we have all failed to show maturity.This goes along with another thought that I have been rolling around in my head for awhile. All sin is ultimately a selfish act. Now I realize that's quite a definitive statement but I have not yet been able to come up with a sin that is not, at its core, based on selfish desire.
And so it gets me back to the concept of maturity. As we age we think that a lot of things make us "mature" - such as bills, homes, family, marriage, the ability to take a joke. However, I wonder how much of us think of maturity as it relates to sin. Being immature is behaving like a child and it is well known that children will act impulsively and utterly selfishly until taught otherwise. Babies are not remotely interested in their mother's sleep schedule. They want food and they want it NOW. It is as children grow and are taught that other people and other people's needs matter that they begin to consider that demanding immediate gratification is not always best..........
Oh wait. I just described the behavior that I have when someone is driving down the road 15 miles under the speed limit. I want them to move and I want it NOW. Seriously.......sorry for the tangent, but you see my point. Even though we may consider ourselves mature we revert back to our childlike behavior and frequently that is when we sin.
The last line of that quote is what really got me thinking about this yesterday. I had my feelings hurt badly last week by someone that I once considered a friend and as frequently happens in those scenarios I mull over the injustice of it in my head thinking over all the vicious things I wish I could say to the person. (By the way I realize that is totally NOT the good Christian nor the right answer, but it is an honest answer). In this case, I was challenged in my thoughts that it was selfish of me to want to speak my mind and, realistically, it was sinful too. Those thoughts I had were not kind, loving or useful for edification; they were hateful and full of spite and disdain. But in our culture it is really promoted. If you feel slighted you have the right to say something, to speak your mind, to rip them a new one...... But I know, at that moment, that I was wrong. I am not mature enough to be able to curb my selfish desire for the immediate gratification of telling that person off. I want to state my case to make myself feel better. It really isn't about hurting the person who hurt me.
It is not wrong to stand up for something that you believe in (and rest assured I believed in my innocence in that situation) but it is sinful when our pride causes us to act selfishly and meet our immediate desire for revenge instead of keeping our eyes focused on the greater goal of pleasing God no matter the cost. It costs the loss of our will to please God. And that means not defending myself against false accusations if my only purpose is to make myself feel better in the moment. I realize that may sound odd but think about Jesus. He was the master of standing up under accusations and hate and not lashing out at people. Jesus kept his eyes focused on why he came in the first place, to save us from our selfish selves even when facing down people bent on hurting him.
How often do we as Christians worry about our "right" to immediate gratification of our desires, whether it is food, speaking our mind, driving speed or any other number of entitlements? If we are to truly live for Christ our "rights" are forfeit. We must give up those things which we feel entitled to and live instead only by the guidelines of Christ. God doesn't give us the right to tear someone else down because they hurt us. God doesn't give us the right to get drunk and forget our problems. God doesn't give us the right to scream and wish a painful death upon the person who cut us off on the freeway; for as my daughter says to me when I'm mad at other drivers, "Mom, they can't hear you." No they can't. I am doing it purely for my own gratification. Those choices are all selfish and all are seeking the immediate gratification of our human sin nature.
While the world may tell you that you have the right to do whatever you want, as a follower of Christ you really don't. Trust me, this is not a bad thing. God does not want for us to continue to be a petulant child. He wants us to grow. He wants us to make better choices. He wants us to mature enough to give up the rights we think we have to exercise to that we may claim the promises he wants to bestow on us. It is not easy but painful. And well worth it.
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